Three generations of Akiyama women. This day could not have happened without the support of my mother-in-law Akiko, who wisely opted not to wear her kimono...
The fanciest kimono on the left is called a furisode, and are worn by unmarried girls, usually up until 29, it's now acceptable. As women age, the kimonos get simpler. I wore my mother's furisode for my high school graduation in Canada. Parents of kids I didn't even know wanted their picture taken with me! Wore a Western and a Chinese wedding dress and skipped the Japanese one. The official Japanese wedding gown is to be pure white so the bride can be colored in whatever way her husband's family wants... Oh... don't like that symbolism... 
Kitsuke -- is the art of learning how to wear a kimono! Indeed, it is an art to know how to fold and tuck and tie. A complete program takes about two years, twice a month and can cost up to $10,000 to receive an official diploma. My mother-in-law took a course for six months and learned to do her own and simple obi ties. She didn't have the confidence to do mine.
Isn't it amazing that I can actually look elegant while being bossy? That's the magic of the kimono. It makes you seem more elegant and refined. Problem is, it's only a facade. Stomping down the stairs of my in-laws' home like an elephant, I prompted slipped and fell halfway down bruising and bashing my body. The kimono though amazingly stayed intacted. Kimonos are best saved for photo sessions.
Daydream for yourself. If ever in Tokyo, you can also wear a kimono. This place specializes in foreign sizes so you don't have to worry. I recommend the natural kimono option rather than the fanciest maiko, geisha or oiran options. Don't the men look great too? The hakama hides any protusion well.
Okay, story continues. My mother-in-law teaches tea ceremony and therefore she wears kimono three times a year for major events. Hers are silk and she had them for decades. Every once in a while, she gets her kimono redye a different color and pattern. It is still cheaper than buying a new one.
The full furisode with all the little trinkets will easily cost around $10,000. I knew a girl who got kimono for her university graduation and her brother got a car! So needless to say, I wasn't going to get my own.
My mother-in-law arranged for a place to do my hair up and put on my kimono for me. It was a "Let's get the village to help prepare" feel. We walked down the road to an old hair salon. The hair lady was fugly... Oh, she was seriously balding and her orange brown comb-over was really unattractive. But I'm sure she knows what to do. Just in case, I made her look at a book with me and picked out a style. There isn't much variation but still I wanted some control. She said in a toothpick at the corner of the mouth, Mafia way, "Ain't nothing I can do to make YOU look like Them, 'kay?" Oh, she was calling me fugly! Yes, I know I won't ever look like those models in the catalog but hell, I ain't ever going to be as fugly as her. She did do a fine job so no complaints.
The kimono lady was much nicer. She kept laughing at me when I'd put my arms through the wrong holes. It's amazing watching her do it. There are layers and layers involved in wearing a kimono and everything has to be pinned and tucked in the right places. It is an outfit made to fit a large range in size, width and height. A novice putting on a kimono will be it suffocatingly tight but an expert can make the whole thing stay together and still let the wearer breathe. She was excellent. Both are time-consuming events, and two hours and $100 later, I am transformed. (There is a point of my mentioning the cost of everything which will come as a punchline at the end of this saga...)
